Alas, poor Dougie Mataconis. Unfortunately for him, we know him well.

Mataconis, who chicken-scratches for the universally unacclaimed and unread Outside the Beltway, is a libertarian with a large L. The classic definition of a libertarian is an individual who advocates liberty and the full exercise of free will. In other words, it’s all about MEEEEEE!

In Mataconis’ case, this takes of form of endless snipes and snarks against most everyone. Despite his desperate efforts to integrate himself with conservatives, Mataconis apparently lives to take potshots at conservatives. Rush Limbaugh? Classless. Christine O’Donnell? Contemptible. And don’t even mention Sarah Palin.

Mataconis’ main hobby is lurking on Twitter, seeking to simultaneously post any gotcha he can find about anyone he dislikes, which covers most everyone presently occupying space on this planet, and engage in what he seemingly believes is arguing with anyone who dares disagree with him. I say seemingly believes, for the moment he is confronted with factual evidence concerning his plethora of errors, or worse yet the same kind of sarcasm he routinely hurls at others, Mataconis either drops out of sight or whines like a spoiled child called out for misbehaving.

Mataconis’ scribbles at OTB languish in their deserved anonymity, for he truly brings nothing to the public discourse. He is a cut and paste curmudgeon, one who recycles the already known and firmly believes a multi-worded version of “me too” and/or “F U” is somehow worthy of public attention. He possesses neither insight nor original thought, instead forever trotting out whatever was hot fifteen minutes ago and hoping no one notices it’s cold leftovers.

Mataconis is the soft white underbelly of blogging, the kid picked for neither team who believes screaming insults from the sidelines somehow levels the playing field yet never once being asked to set foot on same. He is forever hurling bile, yet not once noting he is spitting into the wind. Instead, he stands at the bottom of the hill, forever raging against the wind for having the temerity to not once ask his permission to blow.